Bad Bosses

There’s a well-known saying that we join organisations, but we leave managers.
 
Research conducted by Gallup, Inc. supports the statistics from Kenexa and Forbes.  They go on to quantify the qualities employees want in a manager. The top four are:

1. Managers who show care, interest and concern for their staff
2. To know what is expected of them
3. A role which fits their abilities
4. Positive feedback and recognition regularly for work done well

If you’re not getting these things, does this make your manager a bad manager?
 
Unfortunately it’s not as clear cut. There’s a spectrum and it can be quite obvious at each end of this spectrum as to what a good manager looks like and what a complete a-hole is like, but there’s a murky middle and a wide range of styles and actions that can impact you and your performance.
 
That means it’s up to you to decide where the line is for you to thrive, whether you can shape it to get what you need, or when you need to bail.
 
Quick note:

• Not all managers are created equal!
• Manage up to get what you need
• Manage yourself outta there

This is a little tongue-in-cheek but JA Culture writes about bad bosses and the six toxic personas you might know.
 
1. Hawk-Eye (Micromanagement en mass)
2. Dictator of Expectations (Always searching for proof)
3. The Scream-ER (Reckless & retrospective)
4. Culture Undertaker (Careless about culture)
5. Manic Manipulator (Agent of passive aggression)
6. Captain Titanic (Living in the past)

It’s scary how quickly one or two people will jump to mind as you read that list. It seems so many business focus on developing technical skills yet it’s how someone manages a project or others, and ideally, their leadership style (firm believer that leading and managing are two different things), that ultimately determined sustained performance. Anyone can be an a-hole and push a team to deliver once, but that crew will hit eject as soon as they can, and those that are unable to, will drop in performance too. So it seems crazy how the average $1000 learning and development spend doesn’t go on helping people be great managers and leaders. I’ll save that soapbox session for another day, but will just give you an elbow in the ribs to ask for this kind of training when you’re in the space to do so, it’s invaluable and even if you’re ace at it, there will always be a new tidbit to take in and develop.

As this post has been forming, I’ve had several conversations with people in my world where they’ve been on the receiving end of really bad behaviour. One was in event management, the other in health. In both situations, the person with power, the manager, has behaved poorly. I would say in the event space they were a mix of 2,3,4 and 5 and in health it sounded like a lot of number seven which I’ll add to that list = the General of Goal Post Shifting.

​Actually the event ones did that two. This General sets expectations and continues to change them and add to them so at some stage you’re over loaded and it’s muddy AF as to what the priorities are, all the time you feel like you’re failing as you never quite get it right and the days seem to short to get it all done.

If I had to distil it down, there were some commonalities with the managers making a lot of ‘you’ statements, not allowing time for discussion (assuming their view is correct), giving directives, and seemingly being focused on their own interests and perspectives.
 
Needless to say, both of these very capable women are considering new roles, one has actually been offered an awesome new role with a tech start-up where the early indicators are the founders behave like respectful, competent adults – the bare minimum of what’s required. Thankfully they also have a reputation for being good leaders too.
 
​To help break down whether there’s a chance to work better with this person or whether it’s time to look elsewhere, here’s a couple of red and green flags to consider:

Red flags
Vague expectations
Continually growing list of tasks and responsibilities
Comments or questions about your age, race, beliefs, appearance, family etc
Micro management
Controlling
Using power and authority to ‘get things done’
You statements
Gossips or shares confidential information
Doesn’t deliver what they say they will
Feedback is more often negative, may also be critical

​Green flags
Sets clear expectations
Does what they say they will
Owns their mistakes
Champions the team publically and privately
Maintains confidences
Consistent style
Available for discussion
Stays engaged in dialogue – pays attention
Makes the hard decisions
Has the tough conversations respectfully
Regular commentary on your work, what’s good and what to work on
Feedback is tied to what impact it has and the organisation’s outcomes

In 2019, Stuff shared a summary of the four worst habits of New Zealand managers Ralph Bathurst, a senior lecturer at Massey University’s book “The Good, The Bad and The Downright Ugly Side of New Zealand Business”, these need to be added to the watchlist above! They are:

• Micro managing
• Not trusting staff
• Sticking rigidly to decisions
• Failing up

There’s gems here too for each of us as we develop into management roles, to ensure we also develop the competencies that allow us to be good managers and lead engaged teams.

If you’re in a position where you’re dealing with those kinds of things, it’s up to you to make a call to stay and manage your manager so you’re able to work how you wish, address it directly by speak to them and asking for what you need or asking to understand why they’re taking that approach.
 
If they’re really toxic, get the hell outta there. Sadly, being treated like that will likely erode confidence and you’ll shrink under that kind of boss, where was work should atleast be tolerable, ideally enjoyable. Share your work experiences with people you trust to calibrate it, it’s often surprising how what you start tolerating as ‘normal’ is actually really toxic, and often those around us can reflect that back to us and help us see it’s not okay. It’s amazing when you have a manager who’s draped in green flags, your work and things outside of work are so much more manageable and enjoyable when you have that kind of support.

​You’re worth it. If you need permission here it is - quit if you have to and keep quitting until you have a manager that manages well and you feel valued, engaged and supported to do great work.

References: 
https://medium.com/@JA_Culture/the-bad-boss-6-toxic-personas-you-might-know-b99f4e7ba1fb
https://www.stuff.co.nz/business/116733239/four-worst-habits-of-new-zealand-managers