SURAN DICKSON
It’s not hard to know what Suran Dickson is passionate about, she has spent many, many hours dedicated to the cause and has endless energy to lead change. While teaching and living in London, an incident occurred that drove her to quit teaching and set up an anti-bullying charity; Diversity Role Models. The charity’s purpose is to encourage critical thinking and empathy to reduce bullying in schools around gender/sexuality; they achieve this by taking role models into schools to enable open and honest conversations which break down prejudice.
As the Chief Executive for six years, Suran led the raising of a whopping 1.5 million pounds for the charity before moving back home to New Zealand recently. The move home has been a busy one – she has her own young family, has done some cool stuff with the local entity Brown Bread and has now set up her own venture, Flipside Consulting. Flipside Consulting delivers training for both schools and businesses around leadership, resilience, inclusive behaviour and some challenging stuff like the influences of pornography and social media on society.
Interestingly, her perception of success has changed a lot. “Success", when she was younger, was a representation of materialistic goals, such as a house, a certain job, and a family. She calls them the "trappings of capitalistic success and what society tells us" we should do. Today, a successful career means having an impact and making a difference. Nice!
As the Chief Executive for six years, Suran led the raising of a whopping 1.5 million pounds for the charity before moving back home to New Zealand recently. The move home has been a busy one – she has her own young family, has done some cool stuff with the local entity Brown Bread and has now set up her own venture, Flipside Consulting. Flipside Consulting delivers training for both schools and businesses around leadership, resilience, inclusive behaviour and some challenging stuff like the influences of pornography and social media on society.
Interestingly, her perception of success has changed a lot. “Success", when she was younger, was a representation of materialistic goals, such as a house, a certain job, and a family. She calls them the "trappings of capitalistic success and what society tells us" we should do. Today, a successful career means having an impact and making a difference. Nice!
This is quite a shift in mindset. However, this shift would less likely be needed if that first definition of success was challenged. It’s very capitalist, developed world definition, and it can often come about through media, through children having to grow up with strong stereotypes of ‘success’, further influenced by gender-orientated toys and messaging (often subconsciously). Media and social media also influence society and ‘success’ through putting emphasis on aesthetic, ‘perfect’ bodies and the way people look, which is very superficial. Aspiring to these standards can be really destructive. There's a real opportunity and benefit from shifting the focus to where everyone understands that they are valuable, unique, human beings, and can do what they want to do.
Interestingly, and worryingly, through her work Suran has interviewed girls in schools, where these young women say “leadership is for boys” and they “do not want to do sports because they want to stay small” – which fuels her fire further to support diverse definitions of success and increase understanding of gender in schools.
When asked about which skills Suran wishes she’d developed earlier on, she answered with some powerful ones:
Interestingly, and worryingly, through her work Suran has interviewed girls in schools, where these young women say “leadership is for boys” and they “do not want to do sports because they want to stay small” – which fuels her fire further to support diverse definitions of success and increase understanding of gender in schools.
When asked about which skills Suran wishes she’d developed earlier on, she answered with some powerful ones:
- resilience
- mindfulness
- stress management
We all know the research that shows there are a useful type and a right amount of stress, and this is different for everyone, and it changes for each of us by the minute. The more stressors that pile up, the more significant the impact each incremental one has.
Consider how you would feel if you were to get an email that demands you move to a new house within the next few weeks, or you get a quote from a mechanic for essential repairs that will eat up most of your savings.
These are realities, and you are more likely to cope with it if your other stressors in life (work, relationships, home life) are low. But if you were already under the pump through your job, or friendship worries, caring for a parent, or having some issues with your partner …. or a few of these at once, and then get these new things thrown on top, you are most likely going to struggle to cope.
Suran experienced high-stress levels when she was the CEO of her charity, impacting her mental health. It's a harsh reality that stress will affect significantly on many of us, many times in our lives, and this is why it is so essential to practice resilience and mindfulness.
On the topic of mindfulness, Suran shares her insight that “When people’s minds are wandering, they are less likely to be happy about what they are doing.” Really consider this, let it sink in. Have you ever found yourself in a meeting, doing a task, or staring at a screen, and your mind entirely wandered off? You're mentally somewhere else, to the point that you are not even following what is happening in front of you anymore? If this happens a lot, you should take some time out to really think about whether what you are doing is what you want to do. And if it is not, do invest time and effort developing a list of preferred alternatives, make a decision about what it is that you want to be doing, then create a plan on how to get there.
Women are still faced with the same challenges they have for a long time Suran reminds us, and they’re huge, messy, hard ones to tackle. These challenges include: having or not having a family, work, kids, and a career, and managing whatever combination of these we select. Some women want to have a career first, like Suran, and she gently reminds us all that fertility can become an issue for some, and more as time passes. Knowing yourself and having a plan that is right for you, is essential. There are also lots of women who are unable to have children or choose not to, and the pressure put on them to have kids is "ridiculous". If that is what they would like to do, let them go for it! [Those will be the friends that you can spend time with and NOT talk about your kids (yes, we all know that once you have them, you can't stop talking about them).]
Those blimmin' societal pressures are hard work! If you've experienced any of the demands, we shared, please embrace Suran’s advice “let go of what other people think” and “walk forward with dignity.” We want you always to remember it's your life, your journey, your story and your definition of success!
Women are still faced with the same challenges they have for a long time Suran reminds us, and they’re huge, messy, hard ones to tackle. These challenges include: having or not having a family, work, kids, and a career, and managing whatever combination of these we select. Some women want to have a career first, like Suran, and she gently reminds us all that fertility can become an issue for some, and more as time passes. Knowing yourself and having a plan that is right for you, is essential. There are also lots of women who are unable to have children or choose not to, and the pressure put on them to have kids is "ridiculous". If that is what they would like to do, let them go for it! [Those will be the friends that you can spend time with and NOT talk about your kids (yes, we all know that once you have them, you can't stop talking about them).]
Those blimmin' societal pressures are hard work! If you've experienced any of the demands, we shared, please embrace Suran’s advice “let go of what other people think” and “walk forward with dignity.” We want you always to remember it's your life, your journey, your story and your definition of success!
Here are some more tips for all of us:
1. Don’t be afraid of difficult conversations. Have them, but with a smile on.
2. Turn your emails off, your phone off. You are entitled to have a life.
3. If you are dreading going to work on a Monday morning for a long period time, change your job!
1. Don’t be afraid of difficult conversations. Have them, but with a smile on.
2. Turn your emails off, your phone off. You are entitled to have a life.
3. If you are dreading going to work on a Monday morning for a long period time, change your job!
While working at the charity, Suran was thrown into the deep end when it came to finances. Luckily, she had a good accountant on the Board of Trustees and was merely open about not being an expert in it. She embraced “I know what I don’t know” in this area.
This was well received by the Board, and shows that if we are honest, back ourselves, and surround ourselves with capable people where needed, we will be fine! Although starting a charity can often mean that funding is lean at the start, Suran insisted on being paid the same salary she received as a teacher. After winning an award for her fantastic work, she realised that she should be getting paid more and negotiated with the Board until she got what she aimed for and was a fair rate for the responsibilities she had. In conversations like these, it is crucial to be persistent. “Simply owning it and not beating around the bush is a good way to deal with it” yup, that’s a good approach!
Moving back to New Zealand meant a reorientation in life for Suran. She had put off having children to have a career, and now she was focused on a new stage and having a child. But being a single, working parent requires top-notch organising and planning skills. Suran plans her time very carefully. She plans things that are important to her and organises babysitters ahead of time so she can do more of the things that she loves.
Another good approach is to "not see career, work, and life as being distinct things." They are all part of life, and it is up to us to make sure we are content in each moment, no matter what we are doing. One thing Suran loved doing when she was younger was to run, so that's an integral part of her overall well-being today. It really is essential to do the stuff that lights you up or nurtures and supports you!
This was well received by the Board, and shows that if we are honest, back ourselves, and surround ourselves with capable people where needed, we will be fine! Although starting a charity can often mean that funding is lean at the start, Suran insisted on being paid the same salary she received as a teacher. After winning an award for her fantastic work, she realised that she should be getting paid more and negotiated with the Board until she got what she aimed for and was a fair rate for the responsibilities she had. In conversations like these, it is crucial to be persistent. “Simply owning it and not beating around the bush is a good way to deal with it” yup, that’s a good approach!
Moving back to New Zealand meant a reorientation in life for Suran. She had put off having children to have a career, and now she was focused on a new stage and having a child. But being a single, working parent requires top-notch organising and planning skills. Suran plans her time very carefully. She plans things that are important to her and organises babysitters ahead of time so she can do more of the things that she loves.
Another good approach is to "not see career, work, and life as being distinct things." They are all part of life, and it is up to us to make sure we are content in each moment, no matter what we are doing. One thing Suran loved doing when she was younger was to run, so that's an integral part of her overall well-being today. It really is essential to do the stuff that lights you up or nurtures and supports you!
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Who else writes a daily to-do list? Such a lightbulb moment here when Suran said “my whole life has been to-do lists and I never get it done. And once I have done that I do another one and another one and that is your whole life. And at that point, you are going to be 80 and go: all I did was to-do lists and I never quite got there, and I was never satisfied."
Kat, from here at Careering, always says to friends “I wish it would be Sunday and there would be nothing to do, no housework, no meal prep, no studies or work and next week's meetings etc. are all prepared, how cool would that be? What would I do I such a situation?” But she now also realises that is never going to happen. Instead, she will make the time to do something else that she really wants to too. That is called ‘looking after yourself’, and goes hand in hand with Suran’s commonsense-but-we-need-reminding reminder “learning to put your phone away, letting go of the addiction and experiencing life". |
We also take time to chat about what the future might bring, and something that Suran would like to see become more commonplace is blind CV’s. Looking at a CV, without any names or any clues as to ethnicity, gender etc., will avoid unconscious bias. That leads to work environments that are truly diverse and inclusive. We also spoke about the unnecessary 9 to 5 workday, and just sitting down all day. Suran believes that people should be moving and whatever their role targets and outcomes are, where feasible (and it’s often feasible), they should be empowered to achieve these outcomes in their own flexible time.
To wrap up, we 100% support Suran’s drive to create more awareness and understanding of others, being supportive and kind to ourselves, and to create genuinely inclusive environments. Self-care is so important – please do practice more mindfulness and regularly check in within yourself, ask how things are truly going, celebrate what's working and tweak those elements that might be ready for a change.
To wrap up, we 100% support Suran’s drive to create more awareness and understanding of others, being supportive and kind to ourselves, and to create genuinely inclusive environments. Self-care is so important – please do practice more mindfulness and regularly check in within yourself, ask how things are truly going, celebrate what's working and tweak those elements that might be ready for a change.
** Suran didn’t tell us this, but we uncovered it and thought it was worth celebrating….
In 2014, The Independent on Sunday (UK) ranked Dickson 10th in its Rainbow List of influential LGBT people, having ranked her 20th in the 2013 list, and listed her as a "national treasure" in the 2011 list.
In 2014, The Independent on Sunday (UK) ranked Dickson 10th in its Rainbow List of influential LGBT people, having ranked her 20th in the 2013 list, and listed her as a "national treasure" in the 2011 list.
Interviewee: Suran Dickson, Christchurch, New Zealand.
Role: Leadership and Inclusion Consultant at Flipside Consulting.
You can follow her on LinkedIn here.
Summer 2017/2018
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If you are a cool chick with a great story, we'd love to hear from you. Feel free to send us deets of other amazing ladies you know too, and we will reach out.
Tēnā rawa atu koe.
If you are a cool chick with a great story, we'd love to hear from you. Feel free to send us deets of other amazing ladies you know too, and we will reach out.
Tēnā rawa atu koe.